You left us 2 months ago my precious girl. I can’t find the words to write today so I thought I would borrow some words from a remembrance service I went to 2 weeks ago. I love you baby girl, with all of my being. Your mom Letter from Heaven To my dearest family, some things I’d like to say… But first of all to let you know that I arrived okay. I’m writing this from heaven. Here I dwell with God above. Here there’s no more tears of sadness, there is just eternal love. Please do not be unhappy just…
“Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak knits up the o-er wrought heart and bids it break.” ― William Shakespeare, Macbeth
By Recover the gift
I am fellow traveler on life's often tumultuous roads. I have lived and worked through several life changing traumas and experiences which have shaped my path. I strive to help others overcome adversity and lead fulfilled and flourishing lives.
I have a special interest in Addiction Education and Recovery Coaching, Grief Counselling and general positive life orientation.
People’s reactions to the bereaved – by James
When we hear that someone has lost a family member and specifically a child we are often times lost about what to do or say. When you experience a traumatic and sudden loss of a child you start understanding the varied responses that people give to your loss. Some people are naturally carers and know instinctively what to say and do. Some people are so torn up themselves they cannot call or approach you because it’s just too much. Others adopt an avoidance approach where the subject is not broached at all, possibly mistakenly thinking that the person wants to…
A letter to my little girl from your mom, 8 weeks after you left us – by Simone
My darling Belsie You are touching peoples lives. I posted my first letter to you on our blog and have had such an incredible outpouring from people. It was my inner most thoughts and feelings, written especially to and for you. And I thought very long and very hard before posting it as to bear your soul to all and sundry like that is really really scary. Especially when you are used to being strong and together and not particularly vulnerable. But the way it has been received by most people has been truly heartwarming. I have been so uplifted…
When what you see and feel is the ultimate stranger to your soul – by James
I have experienced and worked through many challenges in life. My father was abusive and eventually shot himself, my dear dear mother fought a long battle with cancer which she lost, I survived a hijacking at gunpoint; I allowed myself to fall into substance abuse and spent a long period of my adult life being on my own, experiencing soul destroying loneliness, something which I have never acknowledged. The Greek philosopher Epictetus said, “It’s not what happens to you but how you react to it that matters.” I believe life is about choice, how you react is about choice. I…
Signs? – by Simone
As I mentioned in an earlier post, I have been looking for signs from you…anything really… A few days ago, I was in our bedroom playing with Murray on the bed, and I suddenly heard this vibrating noise. I ignored it for a while, not being able to figure out what on earth it was. I couldn’t ignore it anymore and I went into the bathroom and somehow my electric toothbrush had turned itself on! Completely bizarre! And I am going to believe that that was a sign from you! Hi my baby girl, mommy hears you and loves…
Everything doesn’t happen for a reason – by James
I was sent the link to this piece by Tim Lawrence (http://www.timjlawrence.com/blog/2015/10/19/everything-doesnt-happen-for-a-reason) by Brad Eaton and then by Simone. Its a great read about the harsh reality of grief and the responsibility one needs take in getting through it. Tim also speaks about how to help the bereaved. Everything Doesn’t Happen For A Reason October 20, 2015 by Tim Lawrence I emerge from this conversation dumbfounded. I’ve seen this a million times before, but it still gets me every time. I’m listening to a man tell a story. A woman he knows was in a devastating car accident; her life shattered…
If I could hold you – by James
I know it’s wrong I know you’re gone, but for you in my arms, one last song. My mind is full of your smiling face, my hands tremble, I cannot brace. When I sit with boy boy for his morning milk, my love for you pulses, sharp like silk. I shed a tear with him because he knows, he pats my head he remembers our rose. The pain I know will go in time, but oh I miss you, face sublime. The void in me a massive gape, I know in time I will escape. My dear sweet mom is…
Look what your mom did Belsie – by Simone
Look what I did baby girl – yes I know, as your Aunty Carol says “Wow, that is left field!!!”. Because it really is for me. But it just feels so right. I now have your name emblazoned on my wrist forever and always!!!! You are forever in my heart and on my mind, but I also wanted you physically on me always, as my constant declaration of being your mom. From the day we conceived you I became your mom forever, and even though you are not physically with us on this earth anymore, you will be with…
Name your grief and walk the road – by James
“When someone you love dies, and you’re not expecting it, you don’t lose her all at once; you lose her in pieces over a long time—the way the mail stops coming, and her scent fades from the pillows and even from the clothes in her closet and drawers. Gradually, you accumulate the parts of her that are gone. Just when the day comes—when there’s a particular missing part that overwhelms you with the feeling that she’s gone, forever—there comes another day, and another specifically missing part.” John Irving – A prayer for Owen Meany It’s been six weeks since our…
My darling rose – by James
My darling rose I see you when I wake at night, a fitful sadness despair through my plight. I see you in the mirrors at home, we always played there now you roam. In my heart you always pure, you’ll touch me always and help me endure. A screaming pain that pulses through me, Oh Lord please hold my child in gentle lee. My ship is sailing a rudderless stave, your smiling face with grace it gave, my joy to have a little girl, your memory always a welcome burl. Isabella my sweet, my darling rose, I…
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